Job Ad

Job Ad

Position(s) now open in an advisory capacity. If female, you must be attractive, willing to tell white lies, able to set aside your sex regarding issues of integrity, of social importance, of morality, be accepting of  possible future reputation ramifications, take an illogical approach to interpreting current events, engage in divisive communication, possibly offering sexual benefits, be easily corrupted morally, intellectually, mentally, philosophically and join supportive members who are corrupt and take financial advantage of current circumstances. Must be willing to interact and communicate using foul language and be anti-social, anti-gay-anti-regulations that protect the consumer including anti-all other movements that attempt to portray and represent the good of the people. You must be a gun lover and user and a gun denier in that only guns kill, and that people play no role. You must be willing to represent a contradictory position on all social value issues and take a loyalty pledge not to the allegiance of a country but rather to a person. It is understood that the values of honesty and fact are to be dismissed at all times so that when questioned about any given issue you are to attack and smear, lie and exaggerate, accuse and pretend at all times. You must not be a person who reads, writes, speaks well or cares about the American people.

If male, all of the above applies but you are to especially be ignorant, evasive, naïve, self-interested especially in financial matters.

Position is temporary, and nothing is based on performance. If interested, please contact Donald J. Trump. Interviews will be scheduled for finalists after the application stage. Finalists will be accommodated at certain key hotel properties. No need to leave a tip; you already have.

Positions now open, well at least through 2020 or possibly 2024.

It is important that you have an attorney on retainer.

No experience required.