This notification is official as it is an announcement
that I am declaring a national emergency in my apartment. For years, the
underwear in one of my drawers has made territorial advances and has been
severely encroaching another closet that houses accessories complimenting said
underwear. Regardless of all attempts to keep a legal separation, and even with
historical mandates controlling undesirable immigration of underwear or other
articles of clothing like socks, which we all know are generally brown in color
for most men and are known to somehow lose themselves among the general
clothing population, from migrating, it is now necessary to declare this
national emergency. Since there are no outside sources of money willing to
absorb the costs of paying money to maintain the sanctity of my clothing, no
help from other closets willing to pay up front and since my clothing is
continuously being influenced by outside forces who have a past as we all know
are of the very worst nature, I have decided to place said underwear in another
drawer removed from other drawers and closets so there is no access any longer
and so that identity and underwear culture remains pure. I understand that this
is a dangerous precedent that can be challenged by shirts and pants especially
those with varied colored schemes arguing exclusion, however it is my God given
right to overrule and march against any clothing which resist my rights. My
legacy will clearly show that I will have been in the right and did what was
necessary to preserve the integrity of my wardrobe.
When you think about a deadly animal, you may think shark, lion, or even a
rhino. However, according to several studies, the deadliest animal in the world
is much smaller and way more irritating. There are more than 100 varieties
of this thing, and it feeds on human blood, transporting a vast array of
diseases from one person to next. Figure it out, yet? That's right—that
buzzing, easy-to-squish mosquito is the deadliest creature, period.
The numbers don't lie: According to the World Health Organization, more
than 725,000 people worldwide are killed by mosquito-borne diseases each
year. These diseases include malaria, dengue fever, yellow fever, and
encephalitis. Malaria has the highest mortality rate, killing at least 600,000
people a year.
"One of the reasons mosquitoes are the most deadly is that they're
able to adapt easily to new environments," Burns Blackwell, president and
chief executive officer of Terminix-Triad, recently told Accuweather.com.
Another reason the bugs are so deadly is that they breed quickly, Blackwell
explains: Mosquitoes have learned to procreate in as little as a few small
drops of water, and each female mosquito can produce between 50 and 500 eggs in
her first brood. Their populations also peak at different times in different
areas all over the world, making it nearly impossible to avoid being bitten.
And every bite increases the risk of contracting a serious disease. Here are 15 more innocent-looking
animals that are surprisingly dangerous.
In areas where mosquitoes are pervasive and carry deadly
diseases, local authorities try to control the population through routine
pesticide applications. You can protect yourself by eliminating places where
standing water can accumulate (think bird baths, tire swings, poorly draining
rain gutters), says Bernard Cohen, MD, professor of dermatology at the Johns
Hopkins University School of Medicine. He also stresses that a little
protection will go a long way: Wear bug repellent that contains DEET (up to 30
percent) when you head outdoors, and reapply it about every four hours.
The next deadliest animal after the mosquito is another one you wouldn't
expect: humans . Around 475,000 people die every year by the hand of another human,
which, when you think about it, sadly isn't that shocking. Finishing out the
list of the five deadliest animals in the world are snakes, dogs, and
the Tsetse fly.
Coming in much further down on the list are hippopotami (killing around 500
people every year), elephants and lions (around 100 each), and wolves and
sharks (around 10 each). These stats are pretty surprising, considering those
are the stereotypical animals that people think of when it comes to
dangerous species, not a tiny mosquito. Here are 22 more animals that are
deadlier than sharks .
The moral of the story is to stay safe—the two most deadly creatures on the
planet are the ones you can barely see buzzing around you and the ones that you
pass on the street every day. Yes, the animal kingdom is a lot more complicated
than you think.